Being successful in both our work and personal lives can be
immensely challenging. And when faced with
these challenges alone, it is human to feel overwhelmed and alone at
times. Yet there is so much we can learn
from one another, so much we can benefit from personal influences, and so much
we can benefit from the support of the right networks.
The creation of the onion is a technique that was taught to
me many years ago by an amazing counsellor, and is receiving more media
attention these days in popular psychology.
An onion is an analogy to describe how one should view the relationships
we form. As an onion has many layers, so
our relationships can be placed within the perspective of ‘layers’. Your inner layer is your closest and most
trusted relationships, whilst the further layers from your core tend to be the
more superficial relationships that you may still value, but will spend less
time on and which offer you less intrinsic value.
The truth is we all use the onion model intuitively to some
extent or another. However, it is possible that your onion at certain times of
your life can quite literally stink! The
quality of your innermost layers are paramount to your health and wellbeing. Sometimes our inner layers contain people who
really belong in the external layers and are demanding too much of our
time. Who have you chosen to keep
closest to you? We need to assess if we
are getting support from these people we hold closest. We need to evaluate if these relationships
are offering us opportunities for personal growth. And we must not neglect our role in maintaining
and nurturing these relationships to ensure our inner core remains healthy.
The onion is first and foremost a useful way to effectively
time manage your relationships– by evaluating the relationships that are most
important to you, you are better able to prioritise those relationships that
you should be spending more time on.
We should also be
creating separate onions for both our business and personal lives.
Yet very few people consider this model when viewing their
business relationships, and constructing an onion for your work life is important
and advantageous to your personal development. Your business network should include
relationships that inspire and challenge you.
There is a lot to be said for the company we keep! Find opportunities to surround yourself with
people that are successful, inspirational and role models or mentors. Place these people in your onion!
Also include people that you would select if you had to
employ your own personal ‘board of directors’.
Keep these people around you, try to lean on them, but always make sure
the relationships are reciprocal, to the extent that the layer of your onion
warrants!
And finally include people in your ‘business onion’ that are
influential, contacts who have great networks that you can leverage off. These networks will soon feed into one another
and soon you will become an influential networker yourself!
Robert Kiyosaki has to say, “The richest people look for and
build networks, everyone else looks for work.” Relationships
are truly key to your effectiveness, therefore consider prioritising your
relationships using the onion for dramatic effect in both your personal and business
life.
Image by lanmee www.freedigitalimages.net
